Category Archives: Relationships

Monday Reflection

What have you learned in this precious lifetime to help you be a better person today?

 

Love Denied

Walk the line between tempest and torment.

Hope lost, love denied, end of innocence.

Douse the lingering fire of lustful dissent.

Praise the wound that bleeds with discontent.

Abandon the heart that loves without consent.

Mom’s Wisdom

These words speak louder than the voices in my head and drown out the chatter of my neurotic inner critic.

My mother used to tell me…

-the only happiness that is achievable is my own-

-the way to love is unconditionally-

-hope can be found in friendship-

-everything happens for a reason-

-live for today-

-treat others the way you want to be treated-

-we all live in glass houses-

-you can’t please everyone-

-respect yourself, even when others don’t-

-tomorrow never comes-

-live in the moment-

-freedom isn’t free-

-this too shall pass-

Choices

Talk or walk?

Hold or fold?

Make up or break up?

I hate it when a relationship falls apart.  Either I’m in complete denial about the situation or I believe I have the power to fix whatever breaks.  Sometimes I forget the other choices…the choice to not fix, to not hide in a fantasy, to face the truth and to take the path that’s best for me.

It doesn’t take long for reality to take over.   Then I remember I have choices.  In the end it’s all about  what’s best for me.

It Takes a Village

It takes a village to raise a child.

This is the tragic story of two children raised in isolation.

This African proverb essentially means that “A child does not grow up only in a single home.”‘  “Regardless of a child’s biological parent(s) its upbringing belongs to the community.”  (Quotes from Wikipedia)

This made me think of all the people involved in a child’s life other than their parents and immediate family.  For example, teachers, friends, neighbors, extended family members and clergy are routinely involved a child’s welfare.

These role models help to shape a child and their viewpoints of the world around them. They set examples and influence a child’s thoughts and behaviors.  A child learns how people behave by observing others, and through the experiences they’re exposed to.

Through positive, supportive interactions with the people in their life a child develops a sense of themselves as being worthy and valuable.  They learn confidence. They learn to trust and to reach out to people.

Being part of a community, a culture or social group helps a child develop social skills. They learn what is acceptable as the norm within the group. They learn to conform to social rules of behavior and learn the value of belonging.  A child forms friendships and strong bonds with peers that provide emotionally satisfying experiences.

I believe it’s important to surround a child with as much love and caring as possible.  It’s normal and necessary to meet a child’s needs with an abundance of supportive people and resources outside of the parent home.  I agree that it takes a village to raise a child.

With that being said, what happens to a child who is prevented from becoming a part of the world beyond the parent’s home? It seems hard to believe that there are children who have never been allowed to experience the typical life of a child.

For months I’ve been wrestling with an experience that shook me, seized me with fear and disgust to my very core. I witnessed first-hand what I consider the most extreme case of child abuse and neglect I’ve ever seen.

I’m not naive…I’ve seen a lot in my lifetime that has made me cringe.  I never would have imagined that parents can raise their children in captivity, isolated and hidden from the outside world.

This is the story about those two beautiful children, now in their late teens, and the tyrant who imprisoned them and stole their lives.  I’m compelled to give those children the voice they deserve.

Children are extraordinarily precious members of society; they are exquisitely alert, sensitive, and conscious of their surroundings; and they are extraordinarily vulnerable to maltreatment or emotional abuse by adults who refuse to give them the profound respect and affection to which they are unconditionally entitled. – Unknown

I was shocked when I met two children who were literally raised in captivity in their parents’ home.  London is 19 years old now and his sister Moon is 16.  Their mother died almost two years ago from cancer. They live at home with their father, who I suspect has been solely responsible for raising them in isolation. I’ve been to their home three times, and each time was more disturbing than the last.

These children shouldn’t be confused with the “wild child” who was raised without any human contact.  Seemingly they were nurtured by their mother.  Their father is present physically but unavailable emotionally.  Other family members have distanced themselves and wear blinders. They sit back in silence and have allowed this to occur.

Their father, the tyrant, is a survivalist. He claimed he was preparing to survive the catastrophe of a collapsed society. He believes the Armageddon will happen in his lifetime and he is preparing for it.  He has a cache of weapons and ammunition in the home and a large collection of items a family would need to survive an apocalyptic event.

You may wonder how the parents were able to hide these children all these years. They never attended school, but were home schooled by their mother. To home school a child, the local public school system requires oversight of the child’s education. They also provide the necessary curriculum.  The children were never enrolled in the public schools.  Because of this, they were virtually nonexistent.

Neither parent is educated beyond high school and has no qualifications to independently home school their children. With no input and oversight by the public school system it’s likely their education is way below even the most minimal standards.  Moon claims she has a sixth grade education and has a learning disability.  Without a professional evaluation there’s no way to know what level of education she has and whether or not she has a learning disability. This is what her parents told her and what she believes to be true. London has yet to take his GED.   Since their mother’s death their education, what little there was, has been ignored.

Not only are they unprepared for the world in terms of education and work skills, they have no solid foundation in social skills. They have no friends their age to talk to and socialize with. They have no face to face peer interaction. In fact, they never leave the house.

A typical teenager gets their license, works and goes to school. They have friends they go out with to shop, eat pizza, watch movies, play sports and just hang out together. These children have no such life.  When questioned the father’s responded, “at least they’re in the house. I know where they are and they’re not getting into trouble.”

How pathetic for those children to be forced to live in isolation.  The only contact they have with the outside world is through the internet.  I observed both of them on the internet every minute they’re awake. London is a gamer and is on the computer at least 12 hours a day every day.  Moon is also on the computer at least 12 hours a day unmonitored with no adult supervision.  This is their only source of stimulation and socialization.  They’re maladjusted and aren’t evolving.

I think I’ve made my point. I will never forget these children. I had to leave the situation because I couldn’t do anything to help them.  He would never allow me to influence the children by giving them what they need…a new life.   I believe it would have been dangerous to stay in the situation. I would have become his hostage too. They are the lost, the forgotten, the undiscovered. I wonder how many more children there are who suffer from a similar tragedy.

**************************************************

This is a true story. The children’s names were changed to protect me and them.

Picture It Fiction

The Lovers

She was the center of his universe.  Once he succumbed to her tempting seduction there was no turning back.  Completely dominated and powerless to escape the thrill of her passion, his only ambition was to please her.   Never would he dare defy or undermine her insatiable need to control him.  He was twisted and manipulated into being exactly what she wanted him to be…a diabolical killer.  The human race was her prey and he was her hit man.

(Photo Credit – Kill them. by Senju-HiMe)

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Picture it and write with ermilia. Write a  paragraph of fiction or a poem to accompany the image. Anyone who wants to join in is welcome. Post a link to your story in their comments.

Black and Blue

Did you ever have a broken heart that took forever to heal…a  heart that  hurt so much it was  black and blue…you’re sure you’ll never get over that person who was such a big love in your life… crying day and night for days, weeks, months and not believing love could hurt so much…wailing and waiting for closure and for the day when you can say your heart is not your enemy?

Then one day you wake up and realize you’re over them.

 

It pays to be fearless. Love to you all…Karm

Weekend Digs

It’s been years since I went to a concert.   Ridiculously high ticket prices is one reason why I lost interest.  Also, I’m not impressed with a lot of the popular music right now.

I’m happy to say I broke my fast this weekend and went to a Jason Mraz concert.  Christina Perri also performed.

I love his music and I had so much fun!  When I woke up the next morning I hurt all over from dancing for hours.

 

 

Mean Girls are Back

I’ve written about my cyber stalkers before. The last couple weeks have been hell for a lot of people. They’ve been stalking and attacking innocent women on the forums every day.  I’ve never seen such cruel.displays of abusive behavior toward total strangers and every day they get more and more out of control.

These women in their fifties and sixties act like thugs and barroom brawlers. The worst part is, the five women get together and bully in a gang. Now one of their thug boyfriends is also doing it with them. They attack women who are minding their own business not bothering anyone.  This has been going on for months and I’m still one of their main targets.

None of them are very intelligent. Yesterday I realized they found my wordpress site and are stalking me here as well.  It’s no coincidence that 3 new sites were made yesterday with no posts and they are following me. It’s sad for them that they are so obsessed with me.

I know who told them about my site. Chris has a blog on wordpress and knew about mine. He’s friends with the mean girls and lately has also been attacking women as part of their gang. If he’s not attacking he’s cheering them on.  For the purpose of this and all future blogs I’ll refer to Chris as Dumpster Diver.

Now, the question is, what do I want to do about it? I can’t keep them from being followers of my blog and all they’re doing is stalking right now but I know they’re on here for no reason other than to start trouble. I have a plan but I’m keeping it quiet today.

If you were in my position what would you do?  How would you handle them?

Picture It and Write Fiction

Sara’s Story

My sister Sara was always attracted to new adventures. She was fast and smart and there were times when I couldn’t keep up with her. She loved playing tennis more than anything and I was sometimes envious of how good she was.  Even on my best days I was no competition for her on the court.

She also loved to read, especially Harry Potter books.  Her favorite quote was by Dumbledore, “Dark and difficult times lie ahead. Soon we must all face the choice between what is right and what is easy.”  Sara decided to join the military when she turned eighteen and there was nothing I could say to change her mind.  Sara became a soldier.

Afghanistan was her last adventure on earth.  At twenty years old she died a hero’s death in combat.  She was my best friend, a proud, courageous, adventurous, strong, beautiful girl who lived and died for what she believed was right.

(This story is purely fiction. I wrote it in memory of the 140 female American soldiers who died serving their country in the name of freedom in Iraq and Afghanistan.)

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Picture it and write with ermilia. Write a  paragraph of fiction or a poem to accompany the image. Anyone who wants to join in is welcome. Post a link to your story in their comments.