Monthly Archives: February 2012

The Easy Way Out

Whatever happened to the old fashioned way of breaking up?

The ideal way to dump someone is face to face with honesty and compassion. If you can be honest and communicate in person that the relationship is over you deserve some credit for being on top of your game. You put on your big boy or big girl pants to pull this off without trying to devastate your soon to be ex. The problem is, it takes courage to step up and many prefer the easy way out.

On the other hand, you might be feeling a lot of anger and hostility if they’ve cheated, lied or have done things to cause you a lot of anguish during the relationship.   Revenge is sweet so if you want to do it in the most hurtful and immature way possible it’s likely one of these will be your breakup method of choice.

-write an email

-send a text

-leave a phone message

-fake your own death

-lose their number

-date their best friend

-become invisible and don’t answer their calls or texts

-leave a Post-It note on their pillow

-have a friend tell them

-change your online status to Single and let them figure it out

Whether you simply want to take the easy way out or feel you need to even the score,  pick your poison wisely because in the world of Karma what goes around comes around.  Have a great day. Love to all…Karm

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Love’s Illusion

Please excuse my appearance tonight…no makeup, hair up in a ponytail, warm pink pajamas and clean white socks, and swollen eyes from a teary session earlier in the day. Sitting cross-legged in my comfy queen size bed I’m surrounded by a menagerie of pillows and a pile of soft knit blankets. Candles provide just enough light to help me find my way around the keyboard.  I prefer to write in silence without distractions. There is no music or TV on. In fact, there are no sounds other than the tapping of my fingers against the keys.

My cat is out for her usual late night hunt and will discard the remains of her prey on the deck for me to sweep away in the morning. The neighborhood is peaceful.  The house is quiet, warm and properly arranged for the night. Now I’m ready to look back over my day.

It’s day 8 of having no contact with my ex-lover.  The occasional thought of him creeps into my brain without warning.  This brings on a flood of emotions that come with the loss of a love.  My mind suddenly becomes twisted and he’s on a pedestal looking down on me while I’m trying to hold onto him, believing  he has the power to determine my fate.

In reality, I tried to adapt to a lifestyle that just didn’t work for me. He was a widow 11 years younger than me with teenage children at home. As hard as I tried to see myself as the woman of the house if our relationship continued, I knew deep down inside my gut  that raising another family was not part of my plan. Regardless, I convinced myself that I was in love with him and when it ended I was heartbroken…go figure. I was chosen by a man years younger than me and my ego took over my common sense. I wasn’t ready to give him up even though he could never be the right one for me.

Luckily sanity returns, the mind untwists and I can once again reason my way out of the tears and painful emotions.  The truth is, he wasn’t that special and I’m not that desperate. Only I can decide who to give my heart to, who to share my spirit with and who to allow to see into my soul. I give only what I want to give, only what I can give and nothing more. No one has the power to determine my fate. It pays to be fearless. Love to all…Karm

Bouncing Back

Lately I’ve been spending too much time moaning, whining, crying and sighing so I took myself out for breakfast today for a change. I went to the little breakfast dive across from where I went to college. Sitting at the counter I was glad I brought a book so I wouldn’t have to talk to anyone. Because I forgot my glasses I could only pretend to read. To my right sat a gentleman who had been one of my professors. I used to tell him he looks like Tony Soprano.

I was embarrassed when the food came because it would have fed 3 people… banana pancakes, home fries, 2 eggs and bacon with a side of hollandaise sauce and massive amounts of coffee. What can I say? I was in the mood for a good carb and fat gorge. He looked at my plate and laughed so I offered him some of my banana pancakes.

We had a great conversation and then he offered to pay for my breakfast.  No, but thank you. When he excused himself to leave he told me he is single and available and gave me his card. He told me to call if I want to have breakfast with him again sometime. That’s when I noticed his intense dark eyes and his confident smile.

Wow!! When one door closes just wait for another door to open.  It sure made me feel good to know he enjoyed my company. I really need to get out more, and maybe I need some cards of my own. It pays to be fearless. Have a great day. Love you all…Karm