It’s time for me to forgive me, not him.
My soul is aching for forgiveness. It wants to soar in freedom and peace.
To release the pain that binds me to the unhappy experience I must confront the self-incrimination.
Self-blame and regret keeps me blinded to the truth. Enough is enough.
I’ve been angry and hurt long enough. I choose life and a chance to love again.
Now it’s time to stop looking for answers and just simply be me again. I am human…a work of art in progress.
I made mistakes along the way and have beaten myself up emotionally.
Today I”m putting the focus back on me and my well-being. All my mistakes are forgivable. Some mistakes are real, others are imagined. My inner voice has shouted that I am a failure…until today.
These are the 20 things about me in that relationship that deserves forgiveness, will seek forgiveness and will be forgiven. I forgive myself for…
- Believing the worst about me
- Being too hard on myself
- The emotional assaults on myself
- Compromising my own values and needs
- Taking a risk that ended up hurting
- Losing my voice and not speaking up
- Not being compassionate toward myself
- Punishing and judging myself as a failure
- Tolerating his lack of capacity for intimacy
- Staying despite the warning signs and red flags
- Letting my self-worth get trampled by rejection
- Avoiding conflict, merely going along to get along
- Trying to comfort him when I was hurting too
- Giving too much of myself to him and not enough to me
- Allowing him to change my perception of the experience
- Letting him intimidate me with his emotional withdrawal
- Staying with a man who was not good for me emotionally
- Settling for feeling like the other woman with his ex/dead wife
- Not leaving his house when it was clear I wasn’t appreciated there
- A gamut of feelings and emotions, i.e. hurt, resentment, anger, frustration, fear, disappointment, shame, guilt, embarrassment and humiliation
What I did, how I felt, my reactions and my emotions are who I am. Once I forgive myself good things will happen. I’ll put on my sexy stockings and high heels and get ready to dance again.
the only thing that matters is what you say about you…not what others say about you.
stay strong and in the present moment to reap your rewards
It pays to be fearless. Love to all….Karm
Posted on April 8, 2012, in Dating & Sex, Photography, Relationships, Spiritual, Writing and tagged breaking up, forgive, healing, love, musings, rants, relationships, sex and dating, women, writing. Bookmark the permalink. 20 Comments.